I choose to take these as instructions...

*is amused* The hotel might have a problem with the first one. *smirks*

I can always offer to pay for a replacement.

Working at a bookstore? *grins* You haven't seen the headboards in this place.

Then I guess I'm crossing that off the list.

For now, anyway. *smirks*

I can solve the problem by pounding you in a bed without a headborad.

But that wouldn't break it. *smirks*

Give the lady a prize.

*grins and raises an eyebrow* Oooh, what do I win?

*digs into his pocket* Let's see...I've got 62 cents and a piece of Bazooka Joe in my pocket. Take your pick.

I'm sure you can think of a better prize than that. *smirks*

Should I check another part of my pants...?

*shakes her head* Nah, probably just as empty as your pocket. *smirks*

And you'll never know...

Mmm, yes, and I'm oh so broken up about it. *smirks more*

*grins* I can tell you're broken up.

I just can't hide it, I'm telling you.